Dearest cohorts o' mine,
So the first full week of student teaching full time is behind us. I have been metaphorically wiping my brow since 3:30 yesterday. I have to admit, getting back into the swing of things after a relatively long winter break had me freaking out more than a little bit. I remember ending last semester feeling great, like I could really see myself in front of my own classroom at some near point in the future. I had a handle on classroom management, I was excited to see my students, and I was excited to be a part of the school culture. It just felt good. I felt good. Then winter break happened and I realized how tired I had been. I talked to friends who were unsure of themselves. I started to become unsure. I started doubting myself and all of the progress I had made; it made for a rocky start to the semester. All of that being said, my first full week in the classroom went well. I am feeling more and more like I have made real connections with my students. It hasn't felt at all superficial. There have been kids who have come to talk to me after school. To ask me for advice about their papers. To tell me something exciting has happened, and I can't seem to get over the high of being a part of their potential energy, even if it is in a small way.
I started my unit on To Kill a Mockingbird this week. I think it's a little too big in my head at this point. We're only one chapter in, and I'm looking at what my mentor wants to do with the book, and what I would love to do with the book, and I'm having a hard time reconciling the two. She really likes having reading quizzes frequently, which, to be fair encourages accountability, but it makes for a lot of grading, and takes up important time in class when I feel like we could be doing COOL things. If students fail a reading quiz, they are handed a worksheet for the following chapter. More grading. More papers to keep track of, and at some level, I'm not sure how much they're going to help. Maybe that comes from not having run a novel yet, but it's making me nervous. Planning my first entire unit on top of having to come up with daily worksheets and reading quizzes, grading everything I hand out, and keeping track of those grades has worked me up right before I should be falling asleep more than once this week. (Suggestions welcome). Still, I'm excited to get kids excited about one of my favorite books in high school. I hope everyone is doing well and feeling light.
Sincerely,
Sam Sweigert
I'd like to say that I am feeling the same way with everything you said. I get home and feel like it's a race to research, type, copy, paste, print, make copies, etc., etc. everything for the next day, not to mention pack my lunch and pick out some suitable clothing. I talked to a social studies teacher who said she does all of her lesson planning at home, and only some grading at home and only on weekends. Now, I realize she's a veteran teacher, but when will I (we) feel confident and capable enough to have a schedule like that? I'm not giving any suggestions here, just hopping on the sympathy express train!
ReplyDeleteDear Sam,
ReplyDeleteI am finding that I have to tone down my ideas about teaching a text, because I want to lead the students in in-depth analysis of the dark themes of Lord of the Flies and Animal Farm. My cooperating teacher is suggesting I not discuss these controversial issues as a student teacher! So I am keeping my ideas for when I have a classroom of my own. Having a mentor is so helpful in navigating the culture of the specific schools in which we are student teaching. I bounce ideas off of my cooperating teacher and she says this is ok as far as parents and administration approval is concerned, but you should save this for when you have tenure! I want a positive student teaching experience, so I am taking my cooperating teacher's advice on what I should include and not include in my lesson plans for Lord of the Flies and Animal Farm. Have you had similar discussions with your cooperating teacher about how to present To Kill a Mockingbird to your students?
Hey Sam -
ReplyDeleteTell me about it - I know EXACTLY how you feel. Last semester was so new and chaotic that when the weekend rolled around, all I wanted to do was lounge around and sleep. My friends would be upset with me when I told them I was too tired to go out, and it frustrated me that they didn't even TRY to understand being in my shoes even when I tried explaining - they just thought I was bailing. By the time break came around, all I was focusing on was catching up on sleep and getting back all my energy. Now that it's spring semester, I'm happy to be back on a routine but I'm really worried I'll fall back into old patterns and habits from last semester.
I know all the grading is frustrating, but just remember our CZ on balance - take everything a day at a time rather than trying to tackle an entire week at once. Make mini goals rather than huge ones and you'll find yourself at ease! I'm going to try that approach with my 8th grade research paper and hopefully my students won't freak out as much. One step at a time - WE CAN DOOOO IT :)